My take on Amsterdam

At about this time last night, we (Alex and I) touched back down at Manchester Airport after a 3 night break to Amsterdam. It was meant to be earlier, but one of the main onboard computers (which we later learnt was the braking system) had crashed, so we had to sit at the gate for an hour whilst they turned it on and off again (Anyone reminded of the IT crowd here?!). Needless to say, that was the most stressed out I've ever been on a flight.

But apart from that, it was definitely a successful trip. Amsterdam is such a picturesque city. We walked to and around everything worth visiting, and some parts that weren't. The vast network canals were definitely the best thing about it. We spent hours wandering around them, and the surrounding Jordaan neighbourhood.

                                                                  See what I mean?

The original plan was to go and see Anne Frank's house, but we got there, saw the queue, and thought fuck it, we've seen the outside of the house, and everyone who's read her diary knows exactly what happened. We only visited one serious museum, the refurbished Rijksmuseum, but, to be honest, that was enough. There's only so much of a museum you can stand in a given length of time. I think we ended up missing out half a floor cos we got fed up. Appalling.

Our B&B was a nice cheap little family-run one in a local neighbourhood (Bed & Breakfast Amsterdam, in case you were wondering) on the other side of the Vondelpark, which meant we had to walk through it to get to the city centre. Not that I'm complaining, it was probably the most relaxing way of getting to a city centre. Ever. Even better when it was sunny. It's something I'd highly recommend. I felt like I got a better feel for regular Dutch life than I ever would if we'd stayed slap-bang in the city centre.

One thing I did notice about Dutch culture was that they like their drink, especially their beer. But it's not in a "down it Fresher!" sort of way. It's more a social "let's have a catch-up over a beer" sort of thing. You're slightly fucked if you're like me and dislike beer, however. I got weird looks when I asked for vodka instead. Ah well.

Which brings me nicely (ish) onto the Dutch cannabis culture. For those of you who don't know, cannabis is technically legal in Amsterdam, although slightly frowned upon if you do it anywhere other than the designated coffeeshops. Which, of course, is what attracts so many people roughly our age to Amsterdam. That and to get completely fucked by other drugs which are also legal in Amsterdam. But we mostly avoided that. We did go into a coffeeshop for a bit, just cos it's something you feel you have to try, but realised that we disliked the "must get fucked" drugs culture as it's no fun walking around a city in broad daylight slightly stoned.

Another part to avoid would be the Red Light District. I know it's what Amsterdam is famous for, but it just feels ridiculously sleazy and like anyone would pickpocket you at any time. We had a quick walk around, then buggered off out. It was interesting seeing erotic shops everywhere, and the sex museum just outside of it was definitely a laugh. They have giant statues of penises, for crying out loud! I feel sorry for anyone who was walking around with their parents....

Oh fuck, I've rambled on loads. Ok, I'll summarise quickly, hopefully without sounding too much like a guidebook.

The bit about Amsterdam most worth seeing I'd say would be:
1) The canals
2) The Vondelpark
3) Jordaan
4) Rijksmuseum (although don't spend too long in there)              
5) The war memorial that looks a bit like a vaginal dilator.

And the things to avoid:
1) Red Light District
2) The Remembrantplein (there's nothing there apart from overpriced shit bars)

There you have it, my take on Amsterdam. Probably nothing like any guidebook you've read before.